Who they were Vol. 2 of 5: Tim Geithner, Jamie Dimon, John Mack

Drawing from his role as the smart mouth, conniving best friend of Wally, Eddie “Geithner” Haskell (a.k.a. “turbo tax” Haskell) was destined to become Treasury Secretary. He was and remains the consummate brown nosing yes man. Wally’s girlfriend’s father described him as an “over stimulated adolescent”. “Turbo tax” Haskell’s sneaky characteristics and his ability to instigate schemes in which someone else was positioned for blame were essential during the TARP bailout program. To date, his classic scheme was using taxpayer funds to pay off banks at par and pronounce, “I recused myself” from day-to-day operations when I was to be nominated as Treasury Secretary.

Prior to becoming the CEO and Chairman of JP Morgan Chase, Jamie “JR” Dimon took on the role of a greedy, scheming oil baron on the hit series Dallas. Initially, “JR” Dimon’s role was deemed supportive however his innate ability to connive, conspire, contrive and manipulate to get what he wanted soon made him a favorite with viewers. “JR” routinely exploited his political ties while crushing his competition. The series was noted for its season ending cliffhangers and “JR” Dimon was an integral part of each and every cliffhanging episode. Could it be that the JPMorgan Chase $25 billion TARP bailout, “JR” Dimon’s re-election as Director to the Federal Reserve Bank of New York and his chummy ties to Treasury and the White House are merely a “Dallas” season ending “Dream” Cliffhanger?

John “Paulie Walnuts” Mack the current Boss (i.e. Chairman) of Morgan Stanley completed his internship as Captain and Underboss in the Soprano crime family. At age 17, he became an enforcer/bodyguard for “Johnny Boy” Soprano. “Paulie Walnuts” Mack (a.k.a “Paulie” Mack) was one of the more colorful characters within the Soprano organization given his highly paranoid state, constant fear of death and on occasion, seeing the Virgin Mary. He once extorted a soccer coach by giving him an unwanted television and remained one of Tony Soprano’s top earners. “Paulie” Mack was well known for his ability and willingness to “take out” anyone in the way of the organization. He took these special skills to Wall Street and became Boss of Morgan Stanley. While at Morgan Stanley, he picked up yet another nick name, “Mack the Knife”. Due to a power struggle within Morgan Stanley, he left and became the boss of the Credit Suisse family. After “taking out” 10,000 people, “Mack the knife” returned to the Morgan Stanley organization as their boss. No known reports of any recent Virgin Mary sightings since his return.

Special thanks to all the fine contributors
at Wikipedia

for assisting Grandpa with my research.